Tag: how to manage conflict

How to Engage in Healthy Conflict

March 22, 2016 | By | Add a Comment

With a nod to contributing author Lori Hollander, LCSW-C, BCD, at GoodTherapy.org, I offer this outline on how to engage in healthy conflict. While the piece is devoted to personal relationships between partners, the model also works well for business relationships. A model for healthy conflict in relationships With couples, several outcomes result when two people engage. If both you and your partner fight, there will be arguments that escalate. If you both avoid conflict, a standoff will occur resulting in a chasm that separates the two of you. Since avoidance creates more avoidance, partners end up living parallel lives without much emotional intimacy. In a relationship where one person withdraws and the other one fights the result will be […]

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Why Avoiding Conflict Creates Conflict

February 9, 2016 | By | Add a Comment

There are, generally, two reasons people avoid conflict: fear of disconnection and fear of being judged. Yet, except in the case of pending physical violence in a conflict-heavy situation, this type of conflict avoidance will usually result in more conflict somewhere down the road. Consider even some of the big conflicts that exist across cultures today, they were brewing for a long time before boiling over. Conflict situations rarely resolve themselves, if ever. Instead, learning to manage conflict is far more effective than simple avoidance. After all, human beings being what we are, disagreements and disputes are to be expected. If you hope to learn how to manage conflict more effectively, you’ll first need to understand your reasons for avoiding […]

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